Sleep Tight, They’ll Bite You Regardless of Precaution

I am very late to the QR Reader game, mostly because I only just realized one of the ways it can be personally benefitting. But that is not what this is about. I was standing on the subway, barely conscious, as most passengers usually are, when I notice a QR code among the ads above the doors in the car. Immediately, I think of capturing the code and have my iPhone interpret it for me at some future point with 3G service. My brain remembers which pocket my phone is in and a split second later my hand is fishing around for the aforementioned phone. Then I stop. I look around, feeling guilty as hell. I just become aware of why I stopped brandishing my state-of-the-art-keeping-up-with-the-jones’-phone. The QR code in question belongs to a Bed Bug exterminator/prevention advertisement. What would people think if they saw me interacting with such a banner? What would I think if I happen to be alerted to some lad fitting my description being super interested, even super technologically interested, in an advertisement littered with Bed Bug material? I would certainly come to this conclusion: that cute guy has Bed Bugs and is desperate for prevention knowledge; why else would he be so actively interested in that ad? The truth of the matter is that, yes, I did in fact have Bed Bugs almost exactly a year ago, no, I have them no longer; but I am only interested in the QR! How do I convey this to the rest of the passengers? I cannot. Therefore I did not take the picture.

I'll Drink To That, I'm Not Particular.

IF I initially reacted to this picture as I should have, I would have only contributed to the subway's already defiled state.


For the readers who also know me fairly well, they can imagine my thought processes upon seeing this...thing. You can click on the picture to see it larger, but, at first glance, this is an advertisement for a pill that would turn one into the famed and vomitous Kanye West. It can work wonders on any person, even if you are an old-ass balding white man. In actuality, this is an advertisement for Absolut Vodka*. So the pill is the vodka in reality? It's hard to say, none of this makes too much sense. The only way to tell the ad's tie to Absolut is at the top, "Available exclusively in an Absolut world". I must have simply not realized "dystopia" is synonymous with "utopia".

*This is the full advertisement in all of its animated splendor, the link to the above picture is in the lower left: http://www.probablythegayestthingIhaveeverseentherearetoo
manythingstomakefunof.com